In American society, many people care about their image. People try to be politically correct when they talk to others not because they want to be good, but because they want to look good. They do this to avoid being called a racist, sexist, or even accused of being mean.
Forgiveness has been taken over by the PC movement. In many after school specials, two friends will get in a fight and one friend will always forgive the other friend, even though the friend continues to mistreat her. Even in the Protestant churches, I met a person who constantly bashed his friend, saying horrible things about her behind her back, but then would always talk to his friend. It was really weird; I asked him why he was friends with this person and he said that he had to forgive her because that is what God wants him to do.
PC forgiveness really confused me and I thought that it was real forgiveness. I was really scared when I read in the Bible that we have to forgive others or God will not forgive us. If I practiced PC forgiveness, people will walk all over me, like a doormat. Then I kept reading the Bible and I found a story about Paul and Barnabas. They traveled together to evangelize to people, and they had a disagreement. Rather than PC forgiving each other and continue to argue; they decided to separate. Paul writes some nice things about Barnabas after they separate, which shows that he forgave Barnabas, even though they separated.
Forgiveness is really just letting go of your anger and bitterness towards someone who hurt you, and it doesn't always lead to reconciliation. Like Paul and Barnabas, sometimes people can't continue to be friends when one of the friends has hurt the other. Obviously, it is unwise for a person to continue PC forgiving someone who isn't sorry and won't change. Pretending that someone hasn't hurt you and continuing to be friends with them will not give you peace and will only open yourself to more hurt from the same person.
The only thing that can give you peace is real forgiveness. When someone continues hurting you and is not sorry and won't change, even if it makes you look bad, its best to end the friendship. Pretending to still be friends with them will only lead you to badmouth them when they are not around, like that guy from my old church. Once the friendship is over, the process of forgiveness can begin. Let go of your anger and bitterness towards that person. Pray that they can be reconciled to God. Ask God to help you forgive them. Once you have forgiven them, you will find real peace, even if everyone thinks that you are mean because you have stopped being friends with someone.
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Are Christians really saved by faith alone?
The first twenty-five years of my life, I was a Protestant. I attended all kinds of different denominations, but they all believed that Christians are saved by accepting Jesus Christ as your personal savior. Once you have accepted Jesus into your heart, you can never lose your salvation, no matter how unChristianly you live. Some people tried to explain to me that having faith means you will live a Christian life, but living it is open to interpretation.
Because the Prostestants believed that they were saved for all eternity from their sins, they acted any way they wanted. In those churches, the only rule that you had to follow was to agree with everything your leader said. Other than that, you could treat people any way you wanted to. If someone disagreed with you, you could call them names. If you didn't like someone's personality, you can snub them. Nobody will say anything to you because that is judging you or expecting all Christians to be perfect. There were always a ton of arguments going on in the churches. People would get mad about something (usually it was kind of petty) and leave.
What was really bad, in my last church, was that I was encouraged to attend a Bible study or a Sunday School class. Every single class that I attended nobody got along with the leader as well as the other people in the class. Of course these classes eventually disbanded. It got so bad that I felt like I was wasting my time 'fellowshipping' with these so called Christians, and I stopped attending the classes and Bible studies. There were so many arguments that we didn't learn anything anyway. After dealing with these people for so long, when someone told me that he was a Christian, I assumed that they really meant jerk.
Christians saved by faith alone makes no sense to me. If Adolf Hitler accepted Jesus as his personal savior once before he killed six million people, he would go to heaven for all eternity. While an atheist who spent his life in the peace corp, would go to hell for all eternity. If God is truly a just God, how can that be fair? Of course the people from my previous churches answer was that we all deserve to go to hell because we have all sinned. It still doesn't answer my question.
Because the Prostestants believed that they were saved for all eternity from their sins, they acted any way they wanted. In those churches, the only rule that you had to follow was to agree with everything your leader said. Other than that, you could treat people any way you wanted to. If someone disagreed with you, you could call them names. If you didn't like someone's personality, you can snub them. Nobody will say anything to you because that is judging you or expecting all Christians to be perfect. There were always a ton of arguments going on in the churches. People would get mad about something (usually it was kind of petty) and leave.
What was really bad, in my last church, was that I was encouraged to attend a Bible study or a Sunday School class. Every single class that I attended nobody got along with the leader as well as the other people in the class. Of course these classes eventually disbanded. It got so bad that I felt like I was wasting my time 'fellowshipping' with these so called Christians, and I stopped attending the classes and Bible studies. There were so many arguments that we didn't learn anything anyway. After dealing with these people for so long, when someone told me that he was a Christian, I assumed that they really meant jerk.
Christians saved by faith alone makes no sense to me. If Adolf Hitler accepted Jesus as his personal savior once before he killed six million people, he would go to heaven for all eternity. While an atheist who spent his life in the peace corp, would go to hell for all eternity. If God is truly a just God, how can that be fair? Of course the people from my previous churches answer was that we all deserve to go to hell because we have all sinned. It still doesn't answer my question.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Heros in our society and the saints
It's really strange how we worship celebrities. A lot of times, celebrities are only known for being famous. They might act in a few movies, but they are really better known for dating someone else who is famous, going to rehab, or denying that they had plastic surgery. Fans will wait for a long time in the cold screaming just to see their favorite celebrity. They are only famous for a few years and then we pay attention to someone else.
When I was a teen, I was a little guilty of that. I didn't look up to any secular artists more contemporary Christian musicians. Michael W. Smith, dc Talk, Rebecca St. James, and Amy Grant were some of my favorites. I honestly thought that they were great Christians because they were brave enough to write about God and were willing to not be as famous because of their stand. I was a teen when the word God and Jesus were in the songs, not like now.
My views changed after I realized that I don't really know them. Amy Grant divorced her first husband to begin dating her second soon to be husband. When she married her second husband, the National Enquirer had pictures of her wedding day for the whole world to see. The NIV Bible says that divorce is only allowed if there is unfaithfulness or abandonment. Plus, knowing how many Christians felt about her divorce and remarriage and her ex husbands feelings, I think that she should've kept her wedding a little more low key.
It's not just with Amy Grant, but some of the other musicians. Some of the men have wives and children, and they are touring a lot away from their wives and children. I know that they feel that they are doing this for the Gospel. If they truly wanted to reach others with their music, they need to make a stronger statement with their songs, instead of singing a love song and saying that its about God. Also, a lot of these musicians are wealthy and live in large homes and have hot tubs and all kinds of other luxuries. If they truly believed in the Gospel, why aren't they living on less, so they can give their money to the poor?
I went to my Protestant church and asked my leaders about that. They said that I was unfairly judging them by my standards and I expected them to be perfect. After they said that, I kind of felt that I shouldn't look up to anyone and I didn't for a long time. Then I learned about the saints.
If there is anyone who deserves fans screaming and shivering outside in the cold for them, it is these guys. St. Francis of Assisi gave up all of his wealth to serve poor lepers. St Monica prayed for her son St. Augustine for years until he became a Christian. Father John Bosco battled a community leader and a bishop to help homeless boys in Turin, Italy. St. Rita prayed for her abusive husband for years, until he became a Christian, then she prayed for miracles for others.
None of these saints are perfect. In every biography that I have ever read about them, the writer always mentions their flaws. The thing that amazes me about them is that they don't let it get them down; they pray to God to help them, and He helps them overcome their sins so they can continue doing their good works. Plus, I feel like I can relate to them more because they face problems, like I do. I never heard about the Christian musicians' problems until after the fact.
It used to be my ultimate goal to meet these Christian musicians and to get them to think I was cool. Now I would just like to assist a saint to his/her good deeds; it would be a great honor in fact. Of course meeting a saint would be wonderful because unlike celebrities, Christian or not, they are so worthy of my admiration.
When I was a teen, I was a little guilty of that. I didn't look up to any secular artists more contemporary Christian musicians. Michael W. Smith, dc Talk, Rebecca St. James, and Amy Grant were some of my favorites. I honestly thought that they were great Christians because they were brave enough to write about God and were willing to not be as famous because of their stand. I was a teen when the word God and Jesus were in the songs, not like now.
My views changed after I realized that I don't really know them. Amy Grant divorced her first husband to begin dating her second soon to be husband. When she married her second husband, the National Enquirer had pictures of her wedding day for the whole world to see. The NIV Bible says that divorce is only allowed if there is unfaithfulness or abandonment. Plus, knowing how many Christians felt about her divorce and remarriage and her ex husbands feelings, I think that she should've kept her wedding a little more low key.
It's not just with Amy Grant, but some of the other musicians. Some of the men have wives and children, and they are touring a lot away from their wives and children. I know that they feel that they are doing this for the Gospel. If they truly wanted to reach others with their music, they need to make a stronger statement with their songs, instead of singing a love song and saying that its about God. Also, a lot of these musicians are wealthy and live in large homes and have hot tubs and all kinds of other luxuries. If they truly believed in the Gospel, why aren't they living on less, so they can give their money to the poor?
I went to my Protestant church and asked my leaders about that. They said that I was unfairly judging them by my standards and I expected them to be perfect. After they said that, I kind of felt that I shouldn't look up to anyone and I didn't for a long time. Then I learned about the saints.
If there is anyone who deserves fans screaming and shivering outside in the cold for them, it is these guys. St. Francis of Assisi gave up all of his wealth to serve poor lepers. St Monica prayed for her son St. Augustine for years until he became a Christian. Father John Bosco battled a community leader and a bishop to help homeless boys in Turin, Italy. St. Rita prayed for her abusive husband for years, until he became a Christian, then she prayed for miracles for others.
None of these saints are perfect. In every biography that I have ever read about them, the writer always mentions their flaws. The thing that amazes me about them is that they don't let it get them down; they pray to God to help them, and He helps them overcome their sins so they can continue doing their good works. Plus, I feel like I can relate to them more because they face problems, like I do. I never heard about the Christian musicians' problems until after the fact.
It used to be my ultimate goal to meet these Christian musicians and to get them to think I was cool. Now I would just like to assist a saint to his/her good deeds; it would be a great honor in fact. Of course meeting a saint would be wonderful because unlike celebrities, Christian or not, they are so worthy of my admiration.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
The Thornbirds is not a love story.
Has anyone ever read the Thornbirds or watched the movie? It is about a priest, Father Ralph, who sleeps with a woman who he knew as a child. The child, Meggie, grows up and falls in love with him and eventually seduces him. She has his child and doesn't tell Father Ralph about his son until after he died. Nobody ever finds out about their affair, and Father Ralph goes on to be a cardinal with his son by his side because his son becomes a priest.
I was a kid when I watched the movie and a teen when I read the book. I grew up Protestant and never knew any priests when I read the book and watched the movie. This story was really passionate and exciting. I watched the movie and thought that the actress who played Meggie, the woman from the Thornbirds, was really beautiful. I was hoping that when I grew up that I would look like her. I also thought that the actors who played the priest and the priest's son were really handsome. The only thing that bothered me about the book was that Meggie was mean to her daughter, who's father was her ex-husband. Other than that it was a great love story, especially when Meggie was a kid and Father Ralph, the priest in the book, was a substitute father to her.
Now that I am a grown-up and have been in a romantic relationship and have met a priest, I don't think that this story is a love story anymore. When you truly love someone, you place that person's desires and wants ahead of your own. Meggie acted very selfishly by seducing Father Ralph knowing how much his career meant to him and that he would lose it and his reputation, if people ever found out about it. (Of course this is fairy tale land and nobody figures it out). Losing everything that he worked for would hurt Father Ralph, but Meggie still slept with him to fulfill her own desires. Meggie may have loved Father Ralph, but her lust for him turned that love into selfishness.
Father Ralph is just as guilty. He knew that he didn't want to leave the priesthood for Meggie or anyone else, but he still slept with her. Meggie left her husband after she and Father Ralph had sex. Meggie never remarried, but continued coveting Father Ralph. If Father Ralph really cared about Meggie, he would put aside his own desires and encourage Meggie to move on, rather than encouraging her to keep waiting around for him. One thing that the book should have covered was the guilt Father Ralph must have felt telling priests and single people to remain chaste, while he is screwing around. Guilt never happens in fairy tale land.
Both of them were stupid and selfish for not thinking about the child that they may be creating and did make before they had sex. I suppose those thoughts always ruin one's mood for lovemaking in soap opera land. Then Meggie didn't think that it was wrong for her to lie to her son about who his dad is. Then this son had to grow up without his father or any man in his life because his parents desired people they couldn't have and thinking only of themselves gave into their lust. The Thornbirds is more of a self-love story than a romantic story.
I was reading some of the comments on the Thornbirds on Amazon.com and Youtube and all that I could think about was the priest who I know. He really loves being a priest, and he is a really wonderful person. The worst thing in the world would be for me to see him in pain, knowing that I caused it. If I did something that ruined his reputation and caused him to lose his career, which means so much to him, it would take a long time for me to forgive myself. It would really hurt him if he had a child who he couldn't see or help raise. This priest who I know cares about my faith in God so much that he would NEVER even suggest that we have a sexual relationship knowing that he would never leave the priesthood for me and that his actions would cause me to lose my faith again.
Personally, I feel that me and the priest I know is a better love story than Meggie and Father Ralph, even though we are not in love with each other. Now our relationship would not be exciting to watch on TV because we just sit around and talk about God and never touch each other, but we really care about one another, which is more than what I can say about Meggie and Father Ralph.
I was a kid when I watched the movie and a teen when I read the book. I grew up Protestant and never knew any priests when I read the book and watched the movie. This story was really passionate and exciting. I watched the movie and thought that the actress who played Meggie, the woman from the Thornbirds, was really beautiful. I was hoping that when I grew up that I would look like her. I also thought that the actors who played the priest and the priest's son were really handsome. The only thing that bothered me about the book was that Meggie was mean to her daughter, who's father was her ex-husband. Other than that it was a great love story, especially when Meggie was a kid and Father Ralph, the priest in the book, was a substitute father to her.
Now that I am a grown-up and have been in a romantic relationship and have met a priest, I don't think that this story is a love story anymore. When you truly love someone, you place that person's desires and wants ahead of your own. Meggie acted very selfishly by seducing Father Ralph knowing how much his career meant to him and that he would lose it and his reputation, if people ever found out about it. (Of course this is fairy tale land and nobody figures it out). Losing everything that he worked for would hurt Father Ralph, but Meggie still slept with him to fulfill her own desires. Meggie may have loved Father Ralph, but her lust for him turned that love into selfishness.
Father Ralph is just as guilty. He knew that he didn't want to leave the priesthood for Meggie or anyone else, but he still slept with her. Meggie left her husband after she and Father Ralph had sex. Meggie never remarried, but continued coveting Father Ralph. If Father Ralph really cared about Meggie, he would put aside his own desires and encourage Meggie to move on, rather than encouraging her to keep waiting around for him. One thing that the book should have covered was the guilt Father Ralph must have felt telling priests and single people to remain chaste, while he is screwing around. Guilt never happens in fairy tale land.
Both of them were stupid and selfish for not thinking about the child that they may be creating and did make before they had sex. I suppose those thoughts always ruin one's mood for lovemaking in soap opera land. Then Meggie didn't think that it was wrong for her to lie to her son about who his dad is. Then this son had to grow up without his father or any man in his life because his parents desired people they couldn't have and thinking only of themselves gave into their lust. The Thornbirds is more of a self-love story than a romantic story.
I was reading some of the comments on the Thornbirds on Amazon.com and Youtube and all that I could think about was the priest who I know. He really loves being a priest, and he is a really wonderful person. The worst thing in the world would be for me to see him in pain, knowing that I caused it. If I did something that ruined his reputation and caused him to lose his career, which means so much to him, it would take a long time for me to forgive myself. It would really hurt him if he had a child who he couldn't see or help raise. This priest who I know cares about my faith in God so much that he would NEVER even suggest that we have a sexual relationship knowing that he would never leave the priesthood for me and that his actions would cause me to lose my faith again.
Personally, I feel that me and the priest I know is a better love story than Meggie and Father Ralph, even though we are not in love with each other. Now our relationship would not be exciting to watch on TV because we just sit around and talk about God and never touch each other, but we really care about one another, which is more than what I can say about Meggie and Father Ralph.
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