For all of the men who read this, you may not understand the Mommy Wars. Let me explain. Stay-at-home moms and career mothers sometimes debate on whose way is better. Stay-at-home moms say that children need one on one attention, which can only be achieved by giving up your career and being a mom full time. Career moms believe that women can only be all that they can be if they have a career outside the home. Then there are women who cut their hours back from their jobs and work part time or have a paid work-at-home job. And some women stay home when before their kids start school and go back to work when they are older. Which view is right?
Stay-at-home moms have unlimited time with their kids. They really get to know them and can adequately respond to their needs. When their child gets sick, they don’t have to ask for time off from their jobs to take care of their kids. They develop a close relationship with their child. When these women can find a balance between their families and their own personal lives, the child thrives. Sometimes women become isolated in their homes and can become lonely. Also, these types of moms can become so focused on their families that they neglect other areas of their own lives. Some moms have no life outside of their kids, which is not only unhealthy for them, but their children as well. In some extreme cases, these moms don’t allow their children to develop relationships outside of family because they have no life without their children.
So are career women better moms? Child care can be beneficial to children. They learn social skills, develop relationships with other adults besides their parents, and it prepares them for school. Some mothers have to put their children in full time day care, so they can learn English. It’s easy for career moms to not focus all of their time on their families, but do they neglect them? Career moms can sometimes become so obsessed with their careers that they do neglect their kids. Some moms are so frazzeled from work that they have to hire a baby-sitter to watch their kids. When moms always put their careers ahead of their kids, their kids start to believe that their moms don’t really care about them. Eighteen years is all that most women get to parent their kids and once those years are gone, they can’t get them back. If they spend all of that time on their careers, they never develop a relationship with their child. After they grow up, they may decide not to have a relationship with their moms, which is a real loss to these women. Also what will these women do when they retire when their whole lives were centered on their work?
Going to my old churches, I heard both sides of the story. When I lived in a small town, working moms looked down on stay-at-home moms because they felt they were too lazy to work. Their husbands only earned minimum wage and they had to work and put their kids in government day care to survive. Stay-at-home moms there really had to cut back on many things to afford staying at home. Then I moved to a suburb and stay-at-home moms looked down on career women as selfish and neglectful of their families. Their husbands made a lot of money and they could afford to stay at home. Many of those career women did work for self-interest rather than for money.
I used to think that all working moms were neglectful of their kids. In many of those families, the parents’ jobs, friends, and hobbies were a higher priority than their children. Children of stay-at-home moms behaved better than the children of these working moms in the small town where I lived. Their parents didn’t discipline them and many of them grew up and became aimless alcoholics who have no goals in life other than having fun at the bar. When I moved to the suburbs, I saw a darker side to the children of stay-at-home moms. I saw four-year-olds who didn’t know how to socialize with other children. Older children who would throw fits every time their mommy left. Some of these kids acted no better than the children that I worked with in day care.
Who is right? I have come to the conclusion that the best moms are the ones who find a balance between their personal life and their family life. While their families are a high priority, their hobbies and friends are not neglected. These women have personal goals that they want to achieve that are outside of their families, whether they have a career or not. Women also need to consider what is best for their families, regarding working or not. I feel that if their husbands don’t earn enough money to support them and their child and they can’t cut back on expenses, then they should work. On the flip side, if the child is disabled and requires extra care, and their husbands can earn enough for them to stay at home, then they should stay at home. The final conclusion that I came up with is that good and bad parents come from all walks of life. There are many great stay-at-home moms as well as bad ones. There are also many wonderful working moms and terrible working moms. It all depends on whether these women can find balance and consider the needs of their families.
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Eat Pray Love Book Review
Oprah interviewed Elizabeth Gilbert a few months ago about her new book Eat Pray Love. Oprah promised viewers that if they read the book and followed it, it would change their lives. Then she interviewed other women who followed Gilbert’s advise and how much happier they were after reading the book. I was really intriqued and decided to read the book to find out if it would change my life.
Eat, Pray, Love is a true story about Elizabeth Gilbert’s life after she almost had a nervous breakdown. The story starts with her living with her husband and crying on the floor in her bathroom every night because she didn’t want to have children with him. Thinking that she would save herself and sanity, she left him and started a relationship with another man. This also didn’t take away her guilt or curb her panic attacks, so she decided to take a year off and travel to Italy, India, and Indonesia to find herself. By the end of that year, she gets better and has a peace in her life. She credits this by finding a balance between meditating and seeking pleasure and encourages women to do the same thing.
Women should only read this book as entertainment and not take it seriously because there are many flaws in Gilbert’s philosophy. This book wasn’t really about her finding a cure for her panic attacks or finding God, but about her finding a belief system to support her selfishness and not feel guilty about it.
Rather than communicating to her husband her fears about being a mom and trying to work things out with him, she leaves him. Then she can’t figure out why he ends up hating her and not even wanting to speak to her. In the meditation school in India, she learns to let go of her guilt over her failed marriage without acknowledging that she was wrong. I am not saying that she should lock herself in her bathroom and cry everyday because of her failed marriage, but I do think that she needs to admit that her actions caused him a lot of pain.
This sort of philosophy is nothing new because criminals do the same thing. The ones that admit that they committed their crimes always try to minimilize and justify it. Their victim had it coming to them. Or the victim’s family will eventually move on. They try to convince people that if society treated them better than they wouldn’t be forced to kill.
Their philosophy flies out the window because they can’t ever look at their victims’ families while they are in the courtroom hoping for justice.
Most of the adults that I know in my life have had disappointments. No one’s life turns out the way that they plan. Some people want to have a spouse, but can’t find one. Some people want children and can’t have them. And some people want a career and can’t get it. The vast majority of them don’t have mental breakdowns and make selfish decisions, but rather deal with their disappointments and move on. The people who I admire the most accept the life they do have and try to make the best of their circumstances. Even if they had the luxuary of taking a year off traveling, they wouldn’t do it.
I seriously wonder what Elizabeth will do the next time she is disappointed with life. Oprah showed viewers what Gilbert’s life is like after writing the book and I have to say it is pretty stress free. She works from home and doesn’t have to keep any set hours and pretty much does whatever she wants. Her philosophy is working because she doesn’t have any stress in her life. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that she had a breakdown after dealing with a disability. She will either do that or permanently move to the meditation school and wish her disability away.
If life has no consequences, then yes her philosophy would work. The thing is life bites back. Selfishness is usually a sin that destroys relationships in the long term. Think about how you feel when you are talking to people who only talk about themselves and never ask how you are doing. I admit that I get to where I just avoid them because I get so tired of hearing about them and they don’t ever listen to me when I want to talk. In a more extreme example, lets say a young mom takes the advice of Eat Pray Love and decides to leave her children because she doesn’t enjoy taking care of them. Rather than admitting that she hurt her children, she tries to find all sorts of ways to justify her actions. Her children grow up and forgive her, but don’t want a relationship with her to spare themselves further pain.
Eat Pray Love should only be read for entertainment purposes because it is fun reading about foreign countries. If women want to find peace in their lives, they should accept that sometimes life comes with disappointments and learn to be unselfish. If they are feeling guilty, they should confess their sins to God or the priest and do restitution to their victim rather than indulging in recreational activities or meditating. Doing this isn’t easy, but it will bring you long term peace.
Eat, Pray, Love is a true story about Elizabeth Gilbert’s life after she almost had a nervous breakdown. The story starts with her living with her husband and crying on the floor in her bathroom every night because she didn’t want to have children with him. Thinking that she would save herself and sanity, she left him and started a relationship with another man. This also didn’t take away her guilt or curb her panic attacks, so she decided to take a year off and travel to Italy, India, and Indonesia to find herself. By the end of that year, she gets better and has a peace in her life. She credits this by finding a balance between meditating and seeking pleasure and encourages women to do the same thing.
Women should only read this book as entertainment and not take it seriously because there are many flaws in Gilbert’s philosophy. This book wasn’t really about her finding a cure for her panic attacks or finding God, but about her finding a belief system to support her selfishness and not feel guilty about it.
Rather than communicating to her husband her fears about being a mom and trying to work things out with him, she leaves him. Then she can’t figure out why he ends up hating her and not even wanting to speak to her. In the meditation school in India, she learns to let go of her guilt over her failed marriage without acknowledging that she was wrong. I am not saying that she should lock herself in her bathroom and cry everyday because of her failed marriage, but I do think that she needs to admit that her actions caused him a lot of pain.
This sort of philosophy is nothing new because criminals do the same thing. The ones that admit that they committed their crimes always try to minimilize and justify it. Their victim had it coming to them. Or the victim’s family will eventually move on. They try to convince people that if society treated them better than they wouldn’t be forced to kill.
Their philosophy flies out the window because they can’t ever look at their victims’ families while they are in the courtroom hoping for justice.
Most of the adults that I know in my life have had disappointments. No one’s life turns out the way that they plan. Some people want to have a spouse, but can’t find one. Some people want children and can’t have them. And some people want a career and can’t get it. The vast majority of them don’t have mental breakdowns and make selfish decisions, but rather deal with their disappointments and move on. The people who I admire the most accept the life they do have and try to make the best of their circumstances. Even if they had the luxuary of taking a year off traveling, they wouldn’t do it.
I seriously wonder what Elizabeth will do the next time she is disappointed with life. Oprah showed viewers what Gilbert’s life is like after writing the book and I have to say it is pretty stress free. She works from home and doesn’t have to keep any set hours and pretty much does whatever she wants. Her philosophy is working because she doesn’t have any stress in her life. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that she had a breakdown after dealing with a disability. She will either do that or permanently move to the meditation school and wish her disability away.
If life has no consequences, then yes her philosophy would work. The thing is life bites back. Selfishness is usually a sin that destroys relationships in the long term. Think about how you feel when you are talking to people who only talk about themselves and never ask how you are doing. I admit that I get to where I just avoid them because I get so tired of hearing about them and they don’t ever listen to me when I want to talk. In a more extreme example, lets say a young mom takes the advice of Eat Pray Love and decides to leave her children because she doesn’t enjoy taking care of them. Rather than admitting that she hurt her children, she tries to find all sorts of ways to justify her actions. Her children grow up and forgive her, but don’t want a relationship with her to spare themselves further pain.
Eat Pray Love should only be read for entertainment purposes because it is fun reading about foreign countries. If women want to find peace in their lives, they should accept that sometimes life comes with disappointments and learn to be unselfish. If they are feeling guilty, they should confess their sins to God or the priest and do restitution to their victim rather than indulging in recreational activities or meditating. Doing this isn’t easy, but it will bring you long term peace.
Sunday, October 5, 2008
A Less Fearful Life
The Left Behind series used to scare me because I would really worry that I would be left behind in the Rapture. What if God decided that I wasn't in a close enough relationship with Him and decided to leave me behind in the Rapture and face the last seven years on Earth alone? The book of Revelations is really scary to read if you take it literally. In a way it would be a relief to die than to continue to live in a world like that.
I would watch movies with plotlines of a dystopia future and freak out because I would always think that there is some kind of merit to it. Even cheesy movies like The Day After Tomorrow and Million Dollar Baby. Or I would listen to environmentalists talk about global warming and be afraid.
Then I have other fears like going blind or becoming disabled. I worry about my husband dying and leaving me a widow or divorcing me.
Since I started looking for God and praying, I am living a less fearful life. For one thing, Catholics believe that we shouldn't focus on the future, but rather what we can do now. Sometimes Christians focus so much on the future because they don't want to live in the present. People who take the Rapture really seriously and give up their jobs and live in their basements waiting for Jesus to return waste their lives now. Especially if He doesn't return in their lifetimes.
Some of my fears are irrational, like the cheesy movies that I would watch. I realize that these kind of movies are based on the writers' view of the world rather than on facts. Sometimes writers want to influence the audience to think like them and they will exaggerate the movie to make their point. Movies are more exciting to watch and sell more tickets if many people get killed, raped, or become victimized and never recover than if there is no violence.
Other fears have gone away because I understand more about God. I know that God will be with me even if the worst happened. If He can be with a priest dying in a concentration camp, He will surely be with me. When God takes something that I love away, I know that He will create a greater good out of it. Somehow my sufferings will touch someone else.
Getting to know God is helping me face my fears with courage. My fears no longer cripple me and has taught me to put faith in something that can control the things that I can't.
I would watch movies with plotlines of a dystopia future and freak out because I would always think that there is some kind of merit to it. Even cheesy movies like The Day After Tomorrow and Million Dollar Baby. Or I would listen to environmentalists talk about global warming and be afraid.
Then I have other fears like going blind or becoming disabled. I worry about my husband dying and leaving me a widow or divorcing me.
Since I started looking for God and praying, I am living a less fearful life. For one thing, Catholics believe that we shouldn't focus on the future, but rather what we can do now. Sometimes Christians focus so much on the future because they don't want to live in the present. People who take the Rapture really seriously and give up their jobs and live in their basements waiting for Jesus to return waste their lives now. Especially if He doesn't return in their lifetimes.
Some of my fears are irrational, like the cheesy movies that I would watch. I realize that these kind of movies are based on the writers' view of the world rather than on facts. Sometimes writers want to influence the audience to think like them and they will exaggerate the movie to make their point. Movies are more exciting to watch and sell more tickets if many people get killed, raped, or become victimized and never recover than if there is no violence.
Other fears have gone away because I understand more about God. I know that God will be with me even if the worst happened. If He can be with a priest dying in a concentration camp, He will surely be with me. When God takes something that I love away, I know that He will create a greater good out of it. Somehow my sufferings will touch someone else.
Getting to know God is helping me face my fears with courage. My fears no longer cripple me and has taught me to put faith in something that can control the things that I can't.
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Forgiveness is the cure for racism
I grew up in the late '80's and early '90's. Every year on TV, there would be a TV movie about a civil rights leader who fought for the rights of Blacks. In my school every year the teachers would talk about the Black man who was lynched in my town 60 years ago. I learned over and over again that racism was bad and racists were always evil.
I became an adult and moved to the city and met some Black people. Some of the ones that I met were not nice to me because of my race. They would make comments like "The company she works for only hires White people." "Girl, you need to get a tan." Of course those comments really offended me, but I didn't say anything because I didn't want people to think that I was a racist.
I hear stories from Whites whose family members were killed by Black people. I have even heard the Blacks guilty of crimes were acquited by a Black jury. Can you imagine the hurt and anger that they must feel because their loved one was savaely murdered and the killer doesn't even go to prison? Even though it isn't right, I can understand why they would hate every Black person that they see.
Then maybe the Black people who made those offensive comments had experiences like this. Maybe that is why they hate every White person they see.
I think that a new message about racism needs to be said. Rather than we have got to love each other and not hate. We need to forgive the people who hurt us, so we can find peace. I believe that the White guy whose relative was murdered will only find peace if he forgives the killer. By hating every Black guy he sees, his heart will only focus on his relative's terrible murder, rather than the good memories he has of her. This man will be unable to move on with his life until he forgives. In this aspect, Blacks are just like Whites because they can choose to forgive or choose to hate.
Imagine what the US would be like if this message was preached. Rather than a false tolerance there would be real healing between the races.
"It is in pardoning, that we are pardoned." St. Francis of Assisi.
I became an adult and moved to the city and met some Black people. Some of the ones that I met were not nice to me because of my race. They would make comments like "The company she works for only hires White people." "Girl, you need to get a tan." Of course those comments really offended me, but I didn't say anything because I didn't want people to think that I was a racist.
I hear stories from Whites whose family members were killed by Black people. I have even heard the Blacks guilty of crimes were acquited by a Black jury. Can you imagine the hurt and anger that they must feel because their loved one was savaely murdered and the killer doesn't even go to prison? Even though it isn't right, I can understand why they would hate every Black person that they see.
Then maybe the Black people who made those offensive comments had experiences like this. Maybe that is why they hate every White person they see.
I think that a new message about racism needs to be said. Rather than we have got to love each other and not hate. We need to forgive the people who hurt us, so we can find peace. I believe that the White guy whose relative was murdered will only find peace if he forgives the killer. By hating every Black guy he sees, his heart will only focus on his relative's terrible murder, rather than the good memories he has of her. This man will be unable to move on with his life until he forgives. In this aspect, Blacks are just like Whites because they can choose to forgive or choose to hate.
Imagine what the US would be like if this message was preached. Rather than a false tolerance there would be real healing between the races.
"It is in pardoning, that we are pardoned." St. Francis of Assisi.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
My view of poor people
It seems that many Americans think that poor people can be helped by giving money to them. On Oprah recently, a guy gave a homeless guy a million dollars and then followed him around with a camera to see what would happen. Most people would think that a year after the homeless guy got the money, he at least at least have a place to stay. It didn't happen that way because he wasted the money and didn't find a job. Of course, he is back on the streets again even though he was given a million dollars.
I would like to say that I was surprised, but I wasn't. Even homeless people have choices and can make their lives better if they chose to. This guy didn't choose to. Before he got the money, he would go in the garbage and collect cans to recycle for money and say that he doesn't want to get a job because he hates rules. Homeless people can stay at shelters for a time for free, if they are willing to follow a few rules. They can also participate in state and private job placement programs, if they are willing to go to work and work at these jobs. It isn't a whole lot, but if they do make these choices, they will eventually get off the streets.
This documentary teaches people that money won't always help poor people. The only way that we wouldn't have poor people is if someone makes all of their decisions for them, but they wouldn't be happy because they are not free. Allowing people to be free means that we allow them to chose to live under a bridge because they want to continue making poor choices.
Since God loves us more than I love humanity, I wonder if it breaks God's heart seeing people suffer because of their sins. God must have a lot of courage and love to not to always intervene when He knows that the people He loves are making bad choices that will hurt them later. He loves us so much He gives us our freedom, rather than making us mindless robots.
I would like to say that I was surprised, but I wasn't. Even homeless people have choices and can make their lives better if they chose to. This guy didn't choose to. Before he got the money, he would go in the garbage and collect cans to recycle for money and say that he doesn't want to get a job because he hates rules. Homeless people can stay at shelters for a time for free, if they are willing to follow a few rules. They can also participate in state and private job placement programs, if they are willing to go to work and work at these jobs. It isn't a whole lot, but if they do make these choices, they will eventually get off the streets.
This documentary teaches people that money won't always help poor people. The only way that we wouldn't have poor people is if someone makes all of their decisions for them, but they wouldn't be happy because they are not free. Allowing people to be free means that we allow them to chose to live under a bridge because they want to continue making poor choices.
Since God loves us more than I love humanity, I wonder if it breaks God's heart seeing people suffer because of their sins. God must have a lot of courage and love to not to always intervene when He knows that the people He loves are making bad choices that will hurt them later. He loves us so much He gives us our freedom, rather than making us mindless robots.
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Don't give up....
I was baptized since I was fourteen. After I was baptized, I had all of these questions when I read the Bible.
What was church like for the first Christians? What did Jesus mean when He talked about marriage and divorce? Where can I find this goodness that I read in the Bible in my world? Why can't I just believe? Why do I still feel guilty for my sins after I have asked God to forgive me?
I would read passages in the Bible and not understand. And I would ask my leaders in the church but they either didn't want to talk about it or didn't give me an answer that would satisfy me.
When Jesus told the Pharisees that they would forever hear, but never understand because they have closed their ears and minds to Him. I panicked because I thought that I would never understand. I remembered praying to God asking Him to open my heart and mind so I could understand.
I have found some answers to my questions by leaving behind the beliefs that I was taught and embracing a new faith. It wasn't easy and I was afraid of going to hell for leaving my church. I was going to give up until a priest told me to keep looking for God until I find Him. I am so glad that I joined the Catholic Church because I have found some of the answers that I have been looking for.
I haven't found all of the answers. Sometimes I think that I will never understand who God is, but I want to understand so I don't give up.
What was church like for the first Christians? What did Jesus mean when He talked about marriage and divorce? Where can I find this goodness that I read in the Bible in my world? Why can't I just believe? Why do I still feel guilty for my sins after I have asked God to forgive me?
I would read passages in the Bible and not understand. And I would ask my leaders in the church but they either didn't want to talk about it or didn't give me an answer that would satisfy me.
When Jesus told the Pharisees that they would forever hear, but never understand because they have closed their ears and minds to Him. I panicked because I thought that I would never understand. I remembered praying to God asking Him to open my heart and mind so I could understand.
I have found some answers to my questions by leaving behind the beliefs that I was taught and embracing a new faith. It wasn't easy and I was afraid of going to hell for leaving my church. I was going to give up until a priest told me to keep looking for God until I find Him. I am so glad that I joined the Catholic Church because I have found some of the answers that I have been looking for.
I haven't found all of the answers. Sometimes I think that I will never understand who God is, but I want to understand so I don't give up.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Perserverence
Life is always easy on TV. There are the lawyers who just graduated from law school who are already wearing expensive suits and living in large homes. Or a guy who is supporting a family who lives in a large house in the city. Outside of TV, my guidance counselor said that all we had to do was to come up with goals to achieve and we would be successful.
What nobody tells you is that that there is a road that you must take to reach your goals. And you have to work hard. To earn a college degree, you have to apply for school and give the school your transcripts and take a standardized test. Once you get accepted to school, you must attend classes, write papers, and pass tests. Not only that, but you have to find a way to pay for classes. You only get your degree when you have finished your classes with an acceptable grade point average. It takes three to four and half years to get a degree, but on TV they just show a person who says she wants a college degree and then the next day she gets it.
When I went to school, there were many people who I knew who dropped out in the first semester. They couldn't manage their time between drinking and studying. Some people thought that since high school was easy college would be easy, and they didn't expect to have to study and go to class and write papers. I notice that people don't just have this attitude with college but also with marriage. Marriage isn't what many people expect and they quit when they realize this.
I have found that if a goal is worth achieving than it is worth working hard for it and perservering through trials to achieve your goal. Whether it is marriage or getting a degree, some things are worth fighting for.
What nobody tells you is that that there is a road that you must take to reach your goals. And you have to work hard. To earn a college degree, you have to apply for school and give the school your transcripts and take a standardized test. Once you get accepted to school, you must attend classes, write papers, and pass tests. Not only that, but you have to find a way to pay for classes. You only get your degree when you have finished your classes with an acceptable grade point average. It takes three to four and half years to get a degree, but on TV they just show a person who says she wants a college degree and then the next day she gets it.
When I went to school, there were many people who I knew who dropped out in the first semester. They couldn't manage their time between drinking and studying. Some people thought that since high school was easy college would be easy, and they didn't expect to have to study and go to class and write papers. I notice that people don't just have this attitude with college but also with marriage. Marriage isn't what many people expect and they quit when they realize this.
I have found that if a goal is worth achieving than it is worth working hard for it and perservering through trials to achieve your goal. Whether it is marriage or getting a degree, some things are worth fighting for.
Monday, June 9, 2008
The possibilities of God's will
I am sometimes amazed by the possibilities for God's will. It can be a number of different things.
God can bring two people together and make them fall in love and marry. And this same God can allow for the death of a spouse or divorce for a married couple.
Some people God creates to be single and others to be married.
He gives people different abilities. Some people are very athletic while others are more academic. Some people have the ability to make a lot of money, while others struggle to get by.
Some people want children and can't have them. While others have children and don't want them.
Some people live and some people die.
I can't possibly even begin to understand God's will. Like Job, I am speechless and dumbfounded when I even think about it. One thing that I do know is that it is God's wish for everyone to find Him. Because no matter where we are in life, in Him we will find peace.
God can bring two people together and make them fall in love and marry. And this same God can allow for the death of a spouse or divorce for a married couple.
Some people God creates to be single and others to be married.
He gives people different abilities. Some people are very athletic while others are more academic. Some people have the ability to make a lot of money, while others struggle to get by.
Some people want children and can't have them. While others have children and don't want them.
Some people live and some people die.
I can't possibly even begin to understand God's will. Like Job, I am speechless and dumbfounded when I even think about it. One thing that I do know is that it is God's wish for everyone to find Him. Because no matter where we are in life, in Him we will find peace.
Monday, May 26, 2008
Coping
As I said in a previous post, I was bullied in high school. I wrote that bullying was good for me. The reason why I wrote that was because I work with someone who was homeschooled to protect her from bullying.
While this woman is a very intelligent and thoughtful woman, I feel that she can't cope very well with a lot of things. She has had two meltdowns on the floor where she cried so loudly that other people couldn't work. One of the incidences was her supervisor told her to get along with other people. The other one was that she told a woman to shut up and then started crying saying that she was tired. I work in customer service and she complains every single time a customer asks her to do something or is cross with her. She expected our manager to solve every problem that she had, and he finally told her to solve it on her own. (She was going to his office several times a week, complaining about petty stuff).
This woman was homeschooled for eight years of her life and never entered a public high school. Even though I wished I could've been sheltered from bullying, I am glad that I wasn't. Because when someone is cross with me, I get mad, but I don't let it ruin my day. I don't ever tell people to shut up when I am tired. And I understand that my job means that I have to do what the customer wants and I only complain if their request is unreasonable.
Sometimes I wish that God would have sheltered me from troubles. But if God did, maybe I would react like the woman who was homeschooled to everyday problems. I woudn't know how to cope.
While this woman is a very intelligent and thoughtful woman, I feel that she can't cope very well with a lot of things. She has had two meltdowns on the floor where she cried so loudly that other people couldn't work. One of the incidences was her supervisor told her to get along with other people. The other one was that she told a woman to shut up and then started crying saying that she was tired. I work in customer service and she complains every single time a customer asks her to do something or is cross with her. She expected our manager to solve every problem that she had, and he finally told her to solve it on her own. (She was going to his office several times a week, complaining about petty stuff).
This woman was homeschooled for eight years of her life and never entered a public high school. Even though I wished I could've been sheltered from bullying, I am glad that I wasn't. Because when someone is cross with me, I get mad, but I don't let it ruin my day. I don't ever tell people to shut up when I am tired. And I understand that my job means that I have to do what the customer wants and I only complain if their request is unreasonable.
Sometimes I wish that God would have sheltered me from troubles. But if God did, maybe I would react like the woman who was homeschooled to everyday problems. I woudn't know how to cope.
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Faith in an unlikely place
Sometimes simple gestures makes a bigger impact on non-believers than preaching to them.
My manager at work met with all fifty of his subordinates and asked them what they needed to make their jobs easier. He wrote down all of their suggestions, even the ones where people suggested chocolate covered doughnuts and pizza on Fridays. And this is the second time this year that he has done that.
I was really touched by that and I can't explain why. He would sacrifice something for all of us, and I think that it is more than his job. I think that he really does care.
It's weird that I have been studying really hard trying to understand God. Regularly attending church thinking that I was going to find Him, when he was right under my nose in my manager. Because if God were my manager, He would act like my manager. I can't believe I found God in a place where I wasn't even looking for Him.
My manager at work met with all fifty of his subordinates and asked them what they needed to make their jobs easier. He wrote down all of their suggestions, even the ones where people suggested chocolate covered doughnuts and pizza on Fridays. And this is the second time this year that he has done that.
I was really touched by that and I can't explain why. He would sacrifice something for all of us, and I think that it is more than his job. I think that he really does care.
It's weird that I have been studying really hard trying to understand God. Regularly attending church thinking that I was going to find Him, when he was right under my nose in my manager. Because if God were my manager, He would act like my manager. I can't believe I found God in a place where I wasn't even looking for Him.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Bullying was good for me
We've all seen school shootings on the news. The story is always the same. This boy who was picked on throughout his school years takes a gun and shoots a bunch of other students. I was bullied in school and I could really idenify with the shooter.
Before I started seeking God, I thought that being bullied was the worst experience of my life. I thought that I would never overcome it. Somehow my future employers would find out that I was bullied in high school and discriminate against me. I thought that I would never have any friends as an adult because I hardly had any friends as a kid. Because I was the kid nobody danced with in middle school, I would never have a boyfriend or husband now that I am an adult. All of this was wrong, but I didn't think so as a kid.
I remembered thinking as a kid that I wasn't going to have a great life, but I wanted to be as happy as I possibly could be. I got a degree and got a job that I'm proud of where I can pay my bills. I work out as much as I can, and some men think that I am cute. I also have some friends. Being a victim of bullying didn't scar me for life. In fact, it has made me who I am.
The Bible says that suffering can make people stronger and help them grow. By reading the Bible and praying, I realized that bullying has made me stronger. When I was bullied, I learned that it wasn't the end of the world if someone doesn't like me. In school, I would worry all weekend about the people who were mean to me. I would wonder what I did to make them mad that week, and get mad at myself for making them mad. If someone is mean to me at work, I am usually upset for a few hours and I get over it. They are not worth ruining my weekend over.
I also learned at what point to stop appeasing an angry person. In school, I would do whatever the bully said to do, so he wouldn't beat me up or make fun of me. I finally realized that the only thing that I got from doing all these things was that he wasn't mean to me for that week. I realized that I had to find another way to solve the problem, so I just told my teacher this and she took care of it. When I run across people like this at my job, I just tell my manager and she takes care of it. Also sometimes people will be mean to me to try to get me to do what they want and because I have been bullied I recognize this. When they try to do that, it makes me dig my heels in the ground and tell them no. Because I will NEVER give in to them again.
Yes, bullying helped make me a stronger person, but I wouldn't have realized this if I didn't read the Bible. In fact if I hadn't looked for God, I would probably be curled up in my closet feeling sorry for myself-or worse in prison because I shot those losers.
Before I started seeking God, I thought that being bullied was the worst experience of my life. I thought that I would never overcome it. Somehow my future employers would find out that I was bullied in high school and discriminate against me. I thought that I would never have any friends as an adult because I hardly had any friends as a kid. Because I was the kid nobody danced with in middle school, I would never have a boyfriend or husband now that I am an adult. All of this was wrong, but I didn't think so as a kid.
I remembered thinking as a kid that I wasn't going to have a great life, but I wanted to be as happy as I possibly could be. I got a degree and got a job that I'm proud of where I can pay my bills. I work out as much as I can, and some men think that I am cute. I also have some friends. Being a victim of bullying didn't scar me for life. In fact, it has made me who I am.
The Bible says that suffering can make people stronger and help them grow. By reading the Bible and praying, I realized that bullying has made me stronger. When I was bullied, I learned that it wasn't the end of the world if someone doesn't like me. In school, I would worry all weekend about the people who were mean to me. I would wonder what I did to make them mad that week, and get mad at myself for making them mad. If someone is mean to me at work, I am usually upset for a few hours and I get over it. They are not worth ruining my weekend over.
I also learned at what point to stop appeasing an angry person. In school, I would do whatever the bully said to do, so he wouldn't beat me up or make fun of me. I finally realized that the only thing that I got from doing all these things was that he wasn't mean to me for that week. I realized that I had to find another way to solve the problem, so I just told my teacher this and she took care of it. When I run across people like this at my job, I just tell my manager and she takes care of it. Also sometimes people will be mean to me to try to get me to do what they want and because I have been bullied I recognize this. When they try to do that, it makes me dig my heels in the ground and tell them no. Because I will NEVER give in to them again.
Yes, bullying helped make me a stronger person, but I wouldn't have realized this if I didn't read the Bible. In fact if I hadn't looked for God, I would probably be curled up in my closet feeling sorry for myself-or worse in prison because I shot those losers.
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Evangelists should be honest with converts
Did you know that if you become a Christian, you will live a long pain free life with plenty of prosperity? Just kidding!!! Some Christians do live a long pain free life with plenty of prosperity, but most people's lives don't change in that respect.
You wouldn't know that by listening to some televangelists.
"God wants you to be rich and debt-free."
What about Job the guy from the Bible who lost everything that he had and became poor? Jesus' parents were poor. What about in the Bible where Jesus said that we must carry our crosses?
"God will help you find a husband."
What if God wants you to stay single? What if you have tried all of the dating websites and you can't find anyone suitable?
"God will cure your disability."
God uses disabled people who bear their sufferings with joy to teach the non-disabled how to handle suffering and can help people look to God. Suffering people who praise God during their trials says more to the lost than a rich guy who has never had any sort of loss. After all, it is much easier to praise God when things are going well for you than when they are not.
The thing that is really terrible is that non-Christians will believe these evangelists and will lose their faith in God when they don't become rich or find a husband or are healed. Anyone trying to convert non-Christians needs to be honest with them. No, they won't become wealthy or find a husband or be healed of their disability by getting saved. Having God in their lives WILL help them deal with being poor, single, and their disability. God cares and Jesus can relate to our sufferings. Jesus was poor and single and He suffered pain and persecution. Evangelists should tell converts the truth about Christianity, so they can believe in something that is real rather than something that is false.
You wouldn't know that by listening to some televangelists.
"God wants you to be rich and debt-free."
What about Job the guy from the Bible who lost everything that he had and became poor? Jesus' parents were poor. What about in the Bible where Jesus said that we must carry our crosses?
"God will help you find a husband."
What if God wants you to stay single? What if you have tried all of the dating websites and you can't find anyone suitable?
"God will cure your disability."
God uses disabled people who bear their sufferings with joy to teach the non-disabled how to handle suffering and can help people look to God. Suffering people who praise God during their trials says more to the lost than a rich guy who has never had any sort of loss. After all, it is much easier to praise God when things are going well for you than when they are not.
The thing that is really terrible is that non-Christians will believe these evangelists and will lose their faith in God when they don't become rich or find a husband or are healed. Anyone trying to convert non-Christians needs to be honest with them. No, they won't become wealthy or find a husband or be healed of their disability by getting saved. Having God in their lives WILL help them deal with being poor, single, and their disability. God cares and Jesus can relate to our sufferings. Jesus was poor and single and He suffered pain and persecution. Evangelists should tell converts the truth about Christianity, so they can believe in something that is real rather than something that is false.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Are there rules for being a Christian?
I've heard my whole life Christians classifying certain behavior as Christian and not Christian. Sometimes people are given the non-Christian label for disagreeing with their political views. Sometimes the way people dress gets the non-Christian label. Sometimes a Christian has sinned or made a mistake and they are damned to hell for all eternity.
Sometimes also people will say that they are a Christian because they want people to think that they are nice people. Politicians will also say that God is on their side when they want to promote a bill. Or somone will say that they are a Christian by not judging people's sinful behavior.
This got me thinking. Is the word Christian like the word pretty? Is it subjective? Can people say any sort of behavior is Christian? American culture says that the word Christian should be subjective. When the word Christian is used subjectively, it loses its meaning.
To keep the word Christian's full meaning, I think that it must follow the following rules:
1. Beliefs-In order for a person or an idea to be labeled Christian, it must uphold the belief in God, Jesus Christ the son of God, and the Holy Spirit. Christians must also believe that the whole Bible is true, not just bits and pieces of it. They can believe in it literally or subjectively.
Example: If a person says that they are a Christian, but they don't believe in God than they are not really a Christian.
2. Christian Pratices-If someone wants to call himself a Christian, he must participate in the following activities: prayer, attending church regularly, and reading the Bible.
Example: "I go to church when I feel like it, which is once every four months." Someone making that statement is not a Christian.
3. Becoming a better person-This can be a little subjective. It basically means that because Christian believes in rule number one and practices rule number two they become kinder to others as time goes on. Obiviously, if someone is a jerk to everyone they meet, then they are not a Christian. This also means that a Christian will stop trying to convert a non-Christian when they have asked them repeatedly to stop.
Example: A woman who says she has been a Christian for twenty years and has an anger management problem and takes her anger out on whoever crosses her path is not a Christian.
What do you think of these rules? I'd love to hear from you. My e-mail is gclaheh@hotmail.com.
Sometimes also people will say that they are a Christian because they want people to think that they are nice people. Politicians will also say that God is on their side when they want to promote a bill. Or somone will say that they are a Christian by not judging people's sinful behavior.
This got me thinking. Is the word Christian like the word pretty? Is it subjective? Can people say any sort of behavior is Christian? American culture says that the word Christian should be subjective. When the word Christian is used subjectively, it loses its meaning.
To keep the word Christian's full meaning, I think that it must follow the following rules:
1. Beliefs-In order for a person or an idea to be labeled Christian, it must uphold the belief in God, Jesus Christ the son of God, and the Holy Spirit. Christians must also believe that the whole Bible is true, not just bits and pieces of it. They can believe in it literally or subjectively.
Example: If a person says that they are a Christian, but they don't believe in God than they are not really a Christian.
2. Christian Pratices-If someone wants to call himself a Christian, he must participate in the following activities: prayer, attending church regularly, and reading the Bible.
Example: "I go to church when I feel like it, which is once every four months." Someone making that statement is not a Christian.
3. Becoming a better person-This can be a little subjective. It basically means that because Christian believes in rule number one and practices rule number two they become kinder to others as time goes on. Obiviously, if someone is a jerk to everyone they meet, then they are not a Christian. This also means that a Christian will stop trying to convert a non-Christian when they have asked them repeatedly to stop.
Example: A woman who says she has been a Christian for twenty years and has an anger management problem and takes her anger out on whoever crosses her path is not a Christian.
What do you think of these rules? I'd love to hear from you. My e-mail is gclaheh@hotmail.com.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Pope Benedict
I have never been excited about a pope before in my life. From my previous church, people told me that the Pope was just an ordinary man. Since other people are excited about his visit to the US, now I am super excited.
He is totally awesome and inspiring. He speaks out against the US's ugly past with minorities and comforted sex abuse victims. He admitted that the church was wrong to protect the pedophile priests. It takes a lot of courage to admit that you were wrong. (I must have tons of courage).
I think that Pope Benedict should have his own music video, just like the Obama girl. Of course it would be tasteful. I obviously wouldn't be dressed in a bikini hugging His Holiness. Maybe a creative person can take clips from his speeches and make a music video. Like someone did with Obama's Yes, We can.
Personally, I feel that Americans embracing the Pope's message will transform their lives more than Obama's message. Not that Obama's message isn't inspiring, but politics will never save us in the way that a relationship with God will.
He is totally awesome and inspiring. He speaks out against the US's ugly past with minorities and comforted sex abuse victims. He admitted that the church was wrong to protect the pedophile priests. It takes a lot of courage to admit that you were wrong. (I must have tons of courage).
I think that Pope Benedict should have his own music video, just like the Obama girl. Of course it would be tasteful. I obviously wouldn't be dressed in a bikini hugging His Holiness. Maybe a creative person can take clips from his speeches and make a music video. Like someone did with Obama's Yes, We can.
Personally, I feel that Americans embracing the Pope's message will transform their lives more than Obama's message. Not that Obama's message isn't inspiring, but politics will never save us in the way that a relationship with God will.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
What I learned from praying
For the longest time, I just couldn't have faith and believe. In the Protestant churches, I tried everything, volunteering in the church, reading the Case for Faith and the Purpose Driven Life, attending Sunday School, and anything else you can think of. Nothing I did ever answered my doubts.
My prayers that time were hilarious now. Protestants are encouraged to pray in their own words. In church, the minister would bow his head and give this long speech for a prayer. While the minister was praying, I would pray in my own words. "Lord, Hi. I am checking in with you this week. Please be with so and so.....Hmm. What am I doing this weekend? Oh I am back, Praise Jesus....What will I eat for lunch? This minister is talking so long my neck is starting to hurt...
While I was exploring Catholicism, I learned already written prayers. And I decided to give it a try because I tried everything else and failed to get my faith back. I said the Act of Love prayer and I learned that even though I have gone through a lot that God is still good to me. Then I said the Rosary and I feel God's prescense when I say that prayer. My most favorite is the Way of the Cross and feel so much love for Jesus for everything that he suffered on the cross for my sake. These prayers, which don't take much time and effort on my part, helped me to get my faith back.
It amazes me so much that I don't work as I did when I was Protestant, yet I feel so much closer to God.
PS I am dying to know who the eight people are who read my blog. Please e-mail me at gclaheh@hotmail.com.
My prayers that time were hilarious now. Protestants are encouraged to pray in their own words. In church, the minister would bow his head and give this long speech for a prayer. While the minister was praying, I would pray in my own words. "Lord, Hi. I am checking in with you this week. Please be with so and so.....Hmm. What am I doing this weekend? Oh I am back, Praise Jesus....What will I eat for lunch? This minister is talking so long my neck is starting to hurt...
While I was exploring Catholicism, I learned already written prayers. And I decided to give it a try because I tried everything else and failed to get my faith back. I said the Act of Love prayer and I learned that even though I have gone through a lot that God is still good to me. Then I said the Rosary and I feel God's prescense when I say that prayer. My most favorite is the Way of the Cross and feel so much love for Jesus for everything that he suffered on the cross for my sake. These prayers, which don't take much time and effort on my part, helped me to get my faith back.
It amazes me so much that I don't work as I did when I was Protestant, yet I feel so much closer to God.
PS I am dying to know who the eight people are who read my blog. Please e-mail me at gclaheh@hotmail.com.
Monday, April 14, 2008
Rules are a good thing for God seekers
I know this is weird coming from me, but I think that rules in church are a good thing. I am the last person who you would ever expect to say that because I hate rules. I love doing what I want to do-regardless of what anyone thinks. I like finding answers to my problems for myself rather than asking a leader what they are.
It took observing things that went on in my college Bible study to get me to change my mind about rules. The leader of the Bible study wasn't someone who the minister appointed, but someone who volunteered. Nobody checked to see what the leader was teaching people or how he was conducting the study. He could've taught something that wasn't even in the Bible or interpreted something from the Bible that is out there, and the church would have no idea. Everyone always had a chance to express their opinions during the study, and since everyone could have their own opinion about the Bible, you never knew who was right.
Not only were there theological arguments during the study, but there were also people complaining about who gets to be a cell group leader. The leader of the Bible study gets to pick a cell group leader to lead small groups of people. The leader picked a woman who was rumored to get drunk during weekends and would skip church a lot. Of course, many people felt that it was unfair and complained.
Well all of these conflicts were distracting me from learning about God, which is why all God seekers go to Bible studies. Even though I love finding out about God, I had to admit that this was a waste of my time because I really didn't learn a whole lot.
The Catholic Church is totally different. They had this young adult mass at my church which I attended. We went to mass first and then went out to eat. Not everyone was friends with everyone, but people got along. The mass was only a half hour, but I felt like I got more out of it than the hour in the Bible study.
What was the difference? Rules! Only the priest or deacon can lead the mass-no one else. The priest has to teach according to what the Archbishop tells him to teach. Nobody I saw was arguing with the priest during mass-I guess if they did they wouldn't be able to take the Euchrarist. The priest did appoint someone to plan the parties, but he wasn't teaching people.
Rules free us from conflict and disorder. Because there was order and rules God seekers can go to this mass and find God, rather than being distracted by complaining and conflict.
It took observing things that went on in my college Bible study to get me to change my mind about rules. The leader of the Bible study wasn't someone who the minister appointed, but someone who volunteered. Nobody checked to see what the leader was teaching people or how he was conducting the study. He could've taught something that wasn't even in the Bible or interpreted something from the Bible that is out there, and the church would have no idea. Everyone always had a chance to express their opinions during the study, and since everyone could have their own opinion about the Bible, you never knew who was right.
Not only were there theological arguments during the study, but there were also people complaining about who gets to be a cell group leader. The leader of the Bible study gets to pick a cell group leader to lead small groups of people. The leader picked a woman who was rumored to get drunk during weekends and would skip church a lot. Of course, many people felt that it was unfair and complained.
Well all of these conflicts were distracting me from learning about God, which is why all God seekers go to Bible studies. Even though I love finding out about God, I had to admit that this was a waste of my time because I really didn't learn a whole lot.
The Catholic Church is totally different. They had this young adult mass at my church which I attended. We went to mass first and then went out to eat. Not everyone was friends with everyone, but people got along. The mass was only a half hour, but I felt like I got more out of it than the hour in the Bible study.
What was the difference? Rules! Only the priest or deacon can lead the mass-no one else. The priest has to teach according to what the Archbishop tells him to teach. Nobody I saw was arguing with the priest during mass-I guess if they did they wouldn't be able to take the Euchrarist. The priest did appoint someone to plan the parties, but he wasn't teaching people.
Rules free us from conflict and disorder. Because there was order and rules God seekers can go to this mass and find God, rather than being distracted by complaining and conflict.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
A Different view of abusers
We've all seen parents who scream at their toddlers in grocery stores. Or become squemish when we hear parents threaten kids with a spanking for a small infraction. I've even heard about parents who left their baby in a hot car who died while they played games.
I used to think that these people were horrible and beyond redemption. And I would see these terrible parents and judge them because I thought that I was so much better than them. Then I worked at a day care and got to understand how these parents felt. I agree that it is wrong to abuse children, but I also think that children need to be disciplined. When the children didn't do what I asked them to do, I put them in time out and would yell at them. Well, some people thought that I was being mean to the kids and judged me-like the abusive parents.
I felt really bad being judged, but I learned how to see abusers as God sees them. The first thing that I learned is that it isn't easy being a parent. Parents have to have the right balance of love and discipline. When a child is out of control and you don't know how to calm him down, it can be stressful. It is even more stressful when everyone is watching you ready to criticize whatever you do to get your kid to calm down. Then when people catch you making a mistake, they condemn you and don't give you redemption. And no one ever forgets what you did and remind you every chance they get.
But God isn't like that. God is willing to forgive anyone who is sorry for their sins and willing to repent. He doesn't want child abusers to spend their lives dwelling on their sins and feeling guilty. He wants them to embrace His forgiveness, turn from their sins, and be reconciled with Him. I think that some of them should go to prison, if they have severely abused their children, but they also desserve to be forgiven.
I used to think that these people were horrible and beyond redemption. And I would see these terrible parents and judge them because I thought that I was so much better than them. Then I worked at a day care and got to understand how these parents felt. I agree that it is wrong to abuse children, but I also think that children need to be disciplined. When the children didn't do what I asked them to do, I put them in time out and would yell at them. Well, some people thought that I was being mean to the kids and judged me-like the abusive parents.
I felt really bad being judged, but I learned how to see abusers as God sees them. The first thing that I learned is that it isn't easy being a parent. Parents have to have the right balance of love and discipline. When a child is out of control and you don't know how to calm him down, it can be stressful. It is even more stressful when everyone is watching you ready to criticize whatever you do to get your kid to calm down. Then when people catch you making a mistake, they condemn you and don't give you redemption. And no one ever forgets what you did and remind you every chance they get.
But God isn't like that. God is willing to forgive anyone who is sorry for their sins and willing to repent. He doesn't want child abusers to spend their lives dwelling on their sins and feeling guilty. He wants them to embrace His forgiveness, turn from their sins, and be reconciled with Him. I think that some of them should go to prison, if they have severely abused their children, but they also desserve to be forgiven.
Saturday, March 29, 2008
God seeking is essential---really
Before I became Catholic, I was a total flake. I didn't have any idea what truth was, so I accepted everything that I was told. When people don't want to find the truth, they accept lies.
I watched the TV news and news shows like 20/20 and Dateline and would believe the messages that they were saying. One false thing that the media says is that there are total victims in our society-like minorities and the poor and women. When bad things happen to them, there is nothing that they can do because they are always victims oppressed by the majority and powerful.
I wasn't alone in believing that message. Many people believe that they are always victims and they can't change their circumstances. They don't work and study and blame society when they are broke. They get involved in multiple abusive relationships and blame men for their suffering. The media sends these messages to make themselves look like they care and to get more viewers. Sometimes people want to believe in lies, so the media is not always at fault. I know that I liked to hear that the irresponsible things that I did wasn't my fault.
Well, I listened and believed the media for awhile, until I realized that my life isn't going anywhere and won't go anywhere. After I was disillusioned by the media, I started searching for God. I read in the Bible that Paul said that he learned to be content with whatever life he had, even if he was poor. I wanted to be like that, so I started praying to God to help me to be content with whatever life I had. I started working and studying, rather than just saying that I was a victim. This changed my life, and I have a full-time job with a salary that I can live on comfortably.
If I would have continued to believe that I was a helpless victim, I wouldn't do anything with my life. I am so glad that I found the truth and didn't continue to believe lies that would ruin me. I hope that anyone who believes that they cannot do anything about their problems will look for God. Only God can help them find the truth that will set them free.
I watched the TV news and news shows like 20/20 and Dateline and would believe the messages that they were saying. One false thing that the media says is that there are total victims in our society-like minorities and the poor and women. When bad things happen to them, there is nothing that they can do because they are always victims oppressed by the majority and powerful.
I wasn't alone in believing that message. Many people believe that they are always victims and they can't change their circumstances. They don't work and study and blame society when they are broke. They get involved in multiple abusive relationships and blame men for their suffering. The media sends these messages to make themselves look like they care and to get more viewers. Sometimes people want to believe in lies, so the media is not always at fault. I know that I liked to hear that the irresponsible things that I did wasn't my fault.
Well, I listened and believed the media for awhile, until I realized that my life isn't going anywhere and won't go anywhere. After I was disillusioned by the media, I started searching for God. I read in the Bible that Paul said that he learned to be content with whatever life he had, even if he was poor. I wanted to be like that, so I started praying to God to help me to be content with whatever life I had. I started working and studying, rather than just saying that I was a victim. This changed my life, and I have a full-time job with a salary that I can live on comfortably.
If I would have continued to believe that I was a helpless victim, I wouldn't do anything with my life. I am so glad that I found the truth and didn't continue to believe lies that would ruin me. I hope that anyone who believes that they cannot do anything about their problems will look for God. Only God can help them find the truth that will set them free.
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Jesus is a different kind of superhero
I watched Captain Planet as a kid. Really dates me, huh? Superheros amaze me. I was thinking about Captain Planet the cartoon and wondered to myself what if Jesus was a superhero.
Then I thought that Jesus is a superhero, just a different kind. Jesus is God himself in human form. He is stripped of His God-like qualities, powers, and characteristics and became a human being, like us. Jesus still had the knowledge of what God was like and he shared it with other people. Sometimes God would give him power not to leap over tall buildings in a single bound, but to heal the sick and feed the hungry.
Jesus does not have a single arch villian because in a way we are all villians. We all sin and it hurts God and Jesus himself. Jesus' idea of saving the world is not defeating an arch enemy, but turning villians into heros like Him. By turning from our sins and towards the God that Jesus tells us about, we stop being villians and become heros like Jesus.
Jesus' most heoric moment was not saving thousands of people from certain death, but dying on a cross as a sacrifice for our sins. Because sin creates a gap between us and God and the only way to fill that gap is for someone to sacrifice His life, and Jesus sacrificed His life for us. Now we have access to God because of Jesus and God can help us stop sinning.
Unlike superheros, Jesus is accessible. If superheros existed in real life, they would never even look my direction. Jesus is available 24/7 for anyone who wants to talk to Him in heaven all you have to do is pray. Unlike comic books, you don't have to pay any money to read about his adventures. Most churches will give away Bibles for free.
Jesus does not wear skintight clothes or a cape, but dresses like everyone else, even though He is God in human form. And sorry Da Vinci code fans, but Jesus remained celebate his whole life, so He never even had a girlfriend because He wanted to devote His life to His ministry to save the world.
Have you ever thought about Jesus as a superhero? It amazes me that He is God himself in human form, but humbeled himself to die for us.
Then I thought that Jesus is a superhero, just a different kind. Jesus is God himself in human form. He is stripped of His God-like qualities, powers, and characteristics and became a human being, like us. Jesus still had the knowledge of what God was like and he shared it with other people. Sometimes God would give him power not to leap over tall buildings in a single bound, but to heal the sick and feed the hungry.
Jesus does not have a single arch villian because in a way we are all villians. We all sin and it hurts God and Jesus himself. Jesus' idea of saving the world is not defeating an arch enemy, but turning villians into heros like Him. By turning from our sins and towards the God that Jesus tells us about, we stop being villians and become heros like Jesus.
Jesus' most heoric moment was not saving thousands of people from certain death, but dying on a cross as a sacrifice for our sins. Because sin creates a gap between us and God and the only way to fill that gap is for someone to sacrifice His life, and Jesus sacrificed His life for us. Now we have access to God because of Jesus and God can help us stop sinning.
Unlike superheros, Jesus is accessible. If superheros existed in real life, they would never even look my direction. Jesus is available 24/7 for anyone who wants to talk to Him in heaven all you have to do is pray. Unlike comic books, you don't have to pay any money to read about his adventures. Most churches will give away Bibles for free.
Jesus does not wear skintight clothes or a cape, but dresses like everyone else, even though He is God in human form. And sorry Da Vinci code fans, but Jesus remained celebate his whole life, so He never even had a girlfriend because He wanted to devote His life to His ministry to save the world.
Have you ever thought about Jesus as a superhero? It amazes me that He is God himself in human form, but humbeled himself to die for us.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Supermoralists are full of it.
You know those people who feel so great about themselves that they have to make everyone else feel like crap? You know the types. For Fundamentalist Christians, they will act like they are better than everyone else because they avoid TV and the movies because of their religous beliefs. Or on the people on the left who drive hybrids and make a show out of befriending minorities and make other people feel bad for not doing what they do. Both sets of people think that they are wonderful examples of their beliefs and think everyone should think and do as they do. You will see them debating with total strangers trying to get them to think like they do.
Their bragging always used to make me feel bad. I am a terrible Christian because I don't think that all moms should be stay-at-home moms. Maybe I don't really care about the environment because I am unwilling to spend part of my Saturday driving miles to recycle my trash. Am I a racist because I don't want to talk to one Black person. Is is racist to feel this way? Now I don't even pay attention to what they say because I have seen true goodness.
I have seen a priest give the Eucharist to a dying person. Dying people don't really matter in our society; we say that they do, but we don't really mean it. Oftentimes, I have seen nursing home residents who never recieve visitors, even during Christmas. Then this priest comes in and gives these patients a little wafer, which is supposed to be the body of Jesus. He does this wonderful thing and he is really humble about it. Rather than bragging about himself, he keeps giving and then goes on his way. Giving dying people hope did more good than recycling, befriending minorities, or avoiding Godless movies, yet this guy will never be recognized or given the credit that supermoralists are always craving.
Their bragging always used to make me feel bad. I am a terrible Christian because I don't think that all moms should be stay-at-home moms. Maybe I don't really care about the environment because I am unwilling to spend part of my Saturday driving miles to recycle my trash. Am I a racist because I don't want to talk to one Black person. Is is racist to feel this way? Now I don't even pay attention to what they say because I have seen true goodness.
I have seen a priest give the Eucharist to a dying person. Dying people don't really matter in our society; we say that they do, but we don't really mean it. Oftentimes, I have seen nursing home residents who never recieve visitors, even during Christmas. Then this priest comes in and gives these patients a little wafer, which is supposed to be the body of Jesus. He does this wonderful thing and he is really humble about it. Rather than bragging about himself, he keeps giving and then goes on his way. Giving dying people hope did more good than recycling, befriending minorities, or avoiding Godless movies, yet this guy will never be recognized or given the credit that supermoralists are always craving.
Saturday, March 8, 2008
What is faith??
I always thought that faith was optimism. When you are down to your last five dollars, you believe that you will not always be broke. Sometimes that is good, when there is hope. Sometimes you have to accept that your unfortunate situation won't change. Someone who is disabled permanately must accept his or her disability. Someone who is dying must accept that he or she is going to die. How can people who have faith when their situation is hopeless?
When I heard that someone was sick, I used to pray that they would get better and have their health fully restored. Sometimes people would get better, but most of the time they would still die. I thought that my prayers were useless, then I studied Catholicism.
I learned that everyone in this life will go through some sort of pain, even if it is only the pain of dying. Because sin has corrupted this world, people suffer and that means we all will die someday. God will comfort and help everyone who turns to Him when they are suffering. God won't always take away their suffering, but He will help them through it. When I pray for someone who is suffering, I should pray that he or she will be open to God's help and that he or she will turn to God to comfort him or her.
There is this person that I know who went through this. He wasn't dying, but he had to deal with disappointment. He really wanted a position in his job, and he was given a chance in that position and he did really badly. He was given another position in his job, which he didn't like. He was really disappointed, and I prayed for that he could accept God's prescence in his life in his new position. I really admire this guy. Instead of feeling sorry for himself, he does his new job with enthusiasm and gusto. He didn't turn his back on God or lose his faith, he kept on praying. Most importantly, he has a new understanding of God. God won't give Him everything that he wants, but He will be there to help him deal with disappointments at not getting what he wants. This guy tells everyone about his new understanding of God.
The reason why many people lose their faith, including me, is because they don't understand what faith really is. It isn't having blind optimism or a positive attitude all the time. Real faith is know that God is there and He cares when you are suffering. I hope that when I suffer, I will turn to God and keep praying and ask God to help me through it.
When I heard that someone was sick, I used to pray that they would get better and have their health fully restored. Sometimes people would get better, but most of the time they would still die. I thought that my prayers were useless, then I studied Catholicism.
I learned that everyone in this life will go through some sort of pain, even if it is only the pain of dying. Because sin has corrupted this world, people suffer and that means we all will die someday. God will comfort and help everyone who turns to Him when they are suffering. God won't always take away their suffering, but He will help them through it. When I pray for someone who is suffering, I should pray that he or she will be open to God's help and that he or she will turn to God to comfort him or her.
There is this person that I know who went through this. He wasn't dying, but he had to deal with disappointment. He really wanted a position in his job, and he was given a chance in that position and he did really badly. He was given another position in his job, which he didn't like. He was really disappointed, and I prayed for that he could accept God's prescence in his life in his new position. I really admire this guy. Instead of feeling sorry for himself, he does his new job with enthusiasm and gusto. He didn't turn his back on God or lose his faith, he kept on praying. Most importantly, he has a new understanding of God. God won't give Him everything that he wants, but He will be there to help him deal with disappointments at not getting what he wants. This guy tells everyone about his new understanding of God.
The reason why many people lose their faith, including me, is because they don't understand what faith really is. It isn't having blind optimism or a positive attitude all the time. Real faith is know that God is there and He cares when you are suffering. I hope that when I suffer, I will turn to God and keep praying and ask God to help me through it.
Saturday, March 1, 2008
God seeking adventures
I never thought that I would ever believe and have faith in God. I can't believe that I believe. I read the Bible when I was a kid, and I loved it! The thing was that I didn't see God in real life, so I couldn't believe.
When I was an adult, I would go to church for awhile and stop because I just couldn't find what I was looking for there. At my last church, I prayed to God that he would lead me to the church he wanted me to go. Then I ran across this priest's blog, and he totally amazed me. He mentioned that he was engaged to a woman, but broke up with her because he felt that God was calling him to be a priest. My previous church was really into Focus on the Family, and this kind of thing was unheard of. Then people would send the priest these nasty e-mails (I know this because he posted these things on his blog) and would answer those hateful people's questions respectfully. This priest seemed to really love his enemies.
Well, I have never tried the Catholic Church because all of the churches that I attended said that Catholics weren't really Christians. In many of my previous churches, there were many former Catholics who attended and they warned me about the evils of the Catholic Church. They couldn't understand why I was studying Catholicism. When I told them I was leaving that church for the Catholic church, they said things like they would pray for me or I should talk to the pastor before I leave. They showed me more love when I was leaving than than they did the whole three years that I attended.
Then I bought all of these books on Catholicism. When I bought them, the lady who was ringing up my bill said that it was OK to read about Catholicism, but not OK to believe in it. Then there was my former co-worker who warned me that Catholics really aren't saved and I was in danger of going to hell. Then there is my mom who told me that none of those priests are celibate and said that they would try to seduce me (that hasn't happened but I have already come up with a mean response when it does).
You would think that all of these setbacks would keep me from seeking God, but no, I am more determined than ever to find Him. I am more than a God seeker, I am a God stalker.
PS-I saw that eight people have read my blog. I didn't know think that anyone was reading my blog. Anyway, my e-mail address is gclaheh@hotmail.com, if you want to contact me.
When I was an adult, I would go to church for awhile and stop because I just couldn't find what I was looking for there. At my last church, I prayed to God that he would lead me to the church he wanted me to go. Then I ran across this priest's blog, and he totally amazed me. He mentioned that he was engaged to a woman, but broke up with her because he felt that God was calling him to be a priest. My previous church was really into Focus on the Family, and this kind of thing was unheard of. Then people would send the priest these nasty e-mails (I know this because he posted these things on his blog) and would answer those hateful people's questions respectfully. This priest seemed to really love his enemies.
Well, I have never tried the Catholic Church because all of the churches that I attended said that Catholics weren't really Christians. In many of my previous churches, there were many former Catholics who attended and they warned me about the evils of the Catholic Church. They couldn't understand why I was studying Catholicism. When I told them I was leaving that church for the Catholic church, they said things like they would pray for me or I should talk to the pastor before I leave. They showed me more love when I was leaving than than they did the whole three years that I attended.
Then I bought all of these books on Catholicism. When I bought them, the lady who was ringing up my bill said that it was OK to read about Catholicism, but not OK to believe in it. Then there was my former co-worker who warned me that Catholics really aren't saved and I was in danger of going to hell. Then there is my mom who told me that none of those priests are celibate and said that they would try to seduce me (that hasn't happened but I have already come up with a mean response when it does).
You would think that all of these setbacks would keep me from seeking God, but no, I am more determined than ever to find Him. I am more than a God seeker, I am a God stalker.
PS-I saw that eight people have read my blog. I didn't know think that anyone was reading my blog. Anyway, my e-mail address is gclaheh@hotmail.com, if you want to contact me.
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
PC forgiveness
In American society, many people care about their image. People try to be politically correct when they talk to others not because they want to be good, but because they want to look good. They do this to avoid being called a racist, sexist, or even accused of being mean.
Forgiveness has been taken over by the PC movement. In many after school specials, two friends will get in a fight and one friend will always forgive the other friend, even though the friend continues to mistreat her. Even in the Protestant churches, I met a person who constantly bashed his friend, saying horrible things about her behind her back, but then would always talk to his friend. It was really weird; I asked him why he was friends with this person and he said that he had to forgive her because that is what God wants him to do.
PC forgiveness really confused me and I thought that it was real forgiveness. I was really scared when I read in the Bible that we have to forgive others or God will not forgive us. If I practiced PC forgiveness, people will walk all over me, like a doormat. Then I kept reading the Bible and I found a story about Paul and Barnabas. They traveled together to evangelize to people, and they had a disagreement. Rather than PC forgiving each other and continue to argue; they decided to separate. Paul writes some nice things about Barnabas after they separate, which shows that he forgave Barnabas, even though they separated.
Forgiveness is really just letting go of your anger and bitterness towards someone who hurt you, and it doesn't always lead to reconciliation. Like Paul and Barnabas, sometimes people can't continue to be friends when one of the friends has hurt the other. Obviously, it is unwise for a person to continue PC forgiving someone who isn't sorry and won't change. Pretending that someone hasn't hurt you and continuing to be friends with them will not give you peace and will only open yourself to more hurt from the same person.
The only thing that can give you peace is real forgiveness. When someone continues hurting you and is not sorry and won't change, even if it makes you look bad, its best to end the friendship. Pretending to still be friends with them will only lead you to badmouth them when they are not around, like that guy from my old church. Once the friendship is over, the process of forgiveness can begin. Let go of your anger and bitterness towards that person. Pray that they can be reconciled to God. Ask God to help you forgive them. Once you have forgiven them, you will find real peace, even if everyone thinks that you are mean because you have stopped being friends with someone.
Forgiveness has been taken over by the PC movement. In many after school specials, two friends will get in a fight and one friend will always forgive the other friend, even though the friend continues to mistreat her. Even in the Protestant churches, I met a person who constantly bashed his friend, saying horrible things about her behind her back, but then would always talk to his friend. It was really weird; I asked him why he was friends with this person and he said that he had to forgive her because that is what God wants him to do.
PC forgiveness really confused me and I thought that it was real forgiveness. I was really scared when I read in the Bible that we have to forgive others or God will not forgive us. If I practiced PC forgiveness, people will walk all over me, like a doormat. Then I kept reading the Bible and I found a story about Paul and Barnabas. They traveled together to evangelize to people, and they had a disagreement. Rather than PC forgiving each other and continue to argue; they decided to separate. Paul writes some nice things about Barnabas after they separate, which shows that he forgave Barnabas, even though they separated.
Forgiveness is really just letting go of your anger and bitterness towards someone who hurt you, and it doesn't always lead to reconciliation. Like Paul and Barnabas, sometimes people can't continue to be friends when one of the friends has hurt the other. Obviously, it is unwise for a person to continue PC forgiving someone who isn't sorry and won't change. Pretending that someone hasn't hurt you and continuing to be friends with them will not give you peace and will only open yourself to more hurt from the same person.
The only thing that can give you peace is real forgiveness. When someone continues hurting you and is not sorry and won't change, even if it makes you look bad, its best to end the friendship. Pretending to still be friends with them will only lead you to badmouth them when they are not around, like that guy from my old church. Once the friendship is over, the process of forgiveness can begin. Let go of your anger and bitterness towards that person. Pray that they can be reconciled to God. Ask God to help you forgive them. Once you have forgiven them, you will find real peace, even if everyone thinks that you are mean because you have stopped being friends with someone.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Are Christians really saved by faith alone?
The first twenty-five years of my life, I was a Protestant. I attended all kinds of different denominations, but they all believed that Christians are saved by accepting Jesus Christ as your personal savior. Once you have accepted Jesus into your heart, you can never lose your salvation, no matter how unChristianly you live. Some people tried to explain to me that having faith means you will live a Christian life, but living it is open to interpretation.
Because the Prostestants believed that they were saved for all eternity from their sins, they acted any way they wanted. In those churches, the only rule that you had to follow was to agree with everything your leader said. Other than that, you could treat people any way you wanted to. If someone disagreed with you, you could call them names. If you didn't like someone's personality, you can snub them. Nobody will say anything to you because that is judging you or expecting all Christians to be perfect. There were always a ton of arguments going on in the churches. People would get mad about something (usually it was kind of petty) and leave.
What was really bad, in my last church, was that I was encouraged to attend a Bible study or a Sunday School class. Every single class that I attended nobody got along with the leader as well as the other people in the class. Of course these classes eventually disbanded. It got so bad that I felt like I was wasting my time 'fellowshipping' with these so called Christians, and I stopped attending the classes and Bible studies. There were so many arguments that we didn't learn anything anyway. After dealing with these people for so long, when someone told me that he was a Christian, I assumed that they really meant jerk.
Christians saved by faith alone makes no sense to me. If Adolf Hitler accepted Jesus as his personal savior once before he killed six million people, he would go to heaven for all eternity. While an atheist who spent his life in the peace corp, would go to hell for all eternity. If God is truly a just God, how can that be fair? Of course the people from my previous churches answer was that we all deserve to go to hell because we have all sinned. It still doesn't answer my question.
Because the Prostestants believed that they were saved for all eternity from their sins, they acted any way they wanted. In those churches, the only rule that you had to follow was to agree with everything your leader said. Other than that, you could treat people any way you wanted to. If someone disagreed with you, you could call them names. If you didn't like someone's personality, you can snub them. Nobody will say anything to you because that is judging you or expecting all Christians to be perfect. There were always a ton of arguments going on in the churches. People would get mad about something (usually it was kind of petty) and leave.
What was really bad, in my last church, was that I was encouraged to attend a Bible study or a Sunday School class. Every single class that I attended nobody got along with the leader as well as the other people in the class. Of course these classes eventually disbanded. It got so bad that I felt like I was wasting my time 'fellowshipping' with these so called Christians, and I stopped attending the classes and Bible studies. There were so many arguments that we didn't learn anything anyway. After dealing with these people for so long, when someone told me that he was a Christian, I assumed that they really meant jerk.
Christians saved by faith alone makes no sense to me. If Adolf Hitler accepted Jesus as his personal savior once before he killed six million people, he would go to heaven for all eternity. While an atheist who spent his life in the peace corp, would go to hell for all eternity. If God is truly a just God, how can that be fair? Of course the people from my previous churches answer was that we all deserve to go to hell because we have all sinned. It still doesn't answer my question.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Heros in our society and the saints
It's really strange how we worship celebrities. A lot of times, celebrities are only known for being famous. They might act in a few movies, but they are really better known for dating someone else who is famous, going to rehab, or denying that they had plastic surgery. Fans will wait for a long time in the cold screaming just to see their favorite celebrity. They are only famous for a few years and then we pay attention to someone else.
When I was a teen, I was a little guilty of that. I didn't look up to any secular artists more contemporary Christian musicians. Michael W. Smith, dc Talk, Rebecca St. James, and Amy Grant were some of my favorites. I honestly thought that they were great Christians because they were brave enough to write about God and were willing to not be as famous because of their stand. I was a teen when the word God and Jesus were in the songs, not like now.
My views changed after I realized that I don't really know them. Amy Grant divorced her first husband to begin dating her second soon to be husband. When she married her second husband, the National Enquirer had pictures of her wedding day for the whole world to see. The NIV Bible says that divorce is only allowed if there is unfaithfulness or abandonment. Plus, knowing how many Christians felt about her divorce and remarriage and her ex husbands feelings, I think that she should've kept her wedding a little more low key.
It's not just with Amy Grant, but some of the other musicians. Some of the men have wives and children, and they are touring a lot away from their wives and children. I know that they feel that they are doing this for the Gospel. If they truly wanted to reach others with their music, they need to make a stronger statement with their songs, instead of singing a love song and saying that its about God. Also, a lot of these musicians are wealthy and live in large homes and have hot tubs and all kinds of other luxuries. If they truly believed in the Gospel, why aren't they living on less, so they can give their money to the poor?
I went to my Protestant church and asked my leaders about that. They said that I was unfairly judging them by my standards and I expected them to be perfect. After they said that, I kind of felt that I shouldn't look up to anyone and I didn't for a long time. Then I learned about the saints.
If there is anyone who deserves fans screaming and shivering outside in the cold for them, it is these guys. St. Francis of Assisi gave up all of his wealth to serve poor lepers. St Monica prayed for her son St. Augustine for years until he became a Christian. Father John Bosco battled a community leader and a bishop to help homeless boys in Turin, Italy. St. Rita prayed for her abusive husband for years, until he became a Christian, then she prayed for miracles for others.
None of these saints are perfect. In every biography that I have ever read about them, the writer always mentions their flaws. The thing that amazes me about them is that they don't let it get them down; they pray to God to help them, and He helps them overcome their sins so they can continue doing their good works. Plus, I feel like I can relate to them more because they face problems, like I do. I never heard about the Christian musicians' problems until after the fact.
It used to be my ultimate goal to meet these Christian musicians and to get them to think I was cool. Now I would just like to assist a saint to his/her good deeds; it would be a great honor in fact. Of course meeting a saint would be wonderful because unlike celebrities, Christian or not, they are so worthy of my admiration.
When I was a teen, I was a little guilty of that. I didn't look up to any secular artists more contemporary Christian musicians. Michael W. Smith, dc Talk, Rebecca St. James, and Amy Grant were some of my favorites. I honestly thought that they were great Christians because they were brave enough to write about God and were willing to not be as famous because of their stand. I was a teen when the word God and Jesus were in the songs, not like now.
My views changed after I realized that I don't really know them. Amy Grant divorced her first husband to begin dating her second soon to be husband. When she married her second husband, the National Enquirer had pictures of her wedding day for the whole world to see. The NIV Bible says that divorce is only allowed if there is unfaithfulness or abandonment. Plus, knowing how many Christians felt about her divorce and remarriage and her ex husbands feelings, I think that she should've kept her wedding a little more low key.
It's not just with Amy Grant, but some of the other musicians. Some of the men have wives and children, and they are touring a lot away from their wives and children. I know that they feel that they are doing this for the Gospel. If they truly wanted to reach others with their music, they need to make a stronger statement with their songs, instead of singing a love song and saying that its about God. Also, a lot of these musicians are wealthy and live in large homes and have hot tubs and all kinds of other luxuries. If they truly believed in the Gospel, why aren't they living on less, so they can give their money to the poor?
I went to my Protestant church and asked my leaders about that. They said that I was unfairly judging them by my standards and I expected them to be perfect. After they said that, I kind of felt that I shouldn't look up to anyone and I didn't for a long time. Then I learned about the saints.
If there is anyone who deserves fans screaming and shivering outside in the cold for them, it is these guys. St. Francis of Assisi gave up all of his wealth to serve poor lepers. St Monica prayed for her son St. Augustine for years until he became a Christian. Father John Bosco battled a community leader and a bishop to help homeless boys in Turin, Italy. St. Rita prayed for her abusive husband for years, until he became a Christian, then she prayed for miracles for others.
None of these saints are perfect. In every biography that I have ever read about them, the writer always mentions their flaws. The thing that amazes me about them is that they don't let it get them down; they pray to God to help them, and He helps them overcome their sins so they can continue doing their good works. Plus, I feel like I can relate to them more because they face problems, like I do. I never heard about the Christian musicians' problems until after the fact.
It used to be my ultimate goal to meet these Christian musicians and to get them to think I was cool. Now I would just like to assist a saint to his/her good deeds; it would be a great honor in fact. Of course meeting a saint would be wonderful because unlike celebrities, Christian or not, they are so worthy of my admiration.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
The Thornbirds is not a love story.
Has anyone ever read the Thornbirds or watched the movie? It is about a priest, Father Ralph, who sleeps with a woman who he knew as a child. The child, Meggie, grows up and falls in love with him and eventually seduces him. She has his child and doesn't tell Father Ralph about his son until after he died. Nobody ever finds out about their affair, and Father Ralph goes on to be a cardinal with his son by his side because his son becomes a priest.
I was a kid when I watched the movie and a teen when I read the book. I grew up Protestant and never knew any priests when I read the book and watched the movie. This story was really passionate and exciting. I watched the movie and thought that the actress who played Meggie, the woman from the Thornbirds, was really beautiful. I was hoping that when I grew up that I would look like her. I also thought that the actors who played the priest and the priest's son were really handsome. The only thing that bothered me about the book was that Meggie was mean to her daughter, who's father was her ex-husband. Other than that it was a great love story, especially when Meggie was a kid and Father Ralph, the priest in the book, was a substitute father to her.
Now that I am a grown-up and have been in a romantic relationship and have met a priest, I don't think that this story is a love story anymore. When you truly love someone, you place that person's desires and wants ahead of your own. Meggie acted very selfishly by seducing Father Ralph knowing how much his career meant to him and that he would lose it and his reputation, if people ever found out about it. (Of course this is fairy tale land and nobody figures it out). Losing everything that he worked for would hurt Father Ralph, but Meggie still slept with him to fulfill her own desires. Meggie may have loved Father Ralph, but her lust for him turned that love into selfishness.
Father Ralph is just as guilty. He knew that he didn't want to leave the priesthood for Meggie or anyone else, but he still slept with her. Meggie left her husband after she and Father Ralph had sex. Meggie never remarried, but continued coveting Father Ralph. If Father Ralph really cared about Meggie, he would put aside his own desires and encourage Meggie to move on, rather than encouraging her to keep waiting around for him. One thing that the book should have covered was the guilt Father Ralph must have felt telling priests and single people to remain chaste, while he is screwing around. Guilt never happens in fairy tale land.
Both of them were stupid and selfish for not thinking about the child that they may be creating and did make before they had sex. I suppose those thoughts always ruin one's mood for lovemaking in soap opera land. Then Meggie didn't think that it was wrong for her to lie to her son about who his dad is. Then this son had to grow up without his father or any man in his life because his parents desired people they couldn't have and thinking only of themselves gave into their lust. The Thornbirds is more of a self-love story than a romantic story.
I was reading some of the comments on the Thornbirds on Amazon.com and Youtube and all that I could think about was the priest who I know. He really loves being a priest, and he is a really wonderful person. The worst thing in the world would be for me to see him in pain, knowing that I caused it. If I did something that ruined his reputation and caused him to lose his career, which means so much to him, it would take a long time for me to forgive myself. It would really hurt him if he had a child who he couldn't see or help raise. This priest who I know cares about my faith in God so much that he would NEVER even suggest that we have a sexual relationship knowing that he would never leave the priesthood for me and that his actions would cause me to lose my faith again.
Personally, I feel that me and the priest I know is a better love story than Meggie and Father Ralph, even though we are not in love with each other. Now our relationship would not be exciting to watch on TV because we just sit around and talk about God and never touch each other, but we really care about one another, which is more than what I can say about Meggie and Father Ralph.
I was a kid when I watched the movie and a teen when I read the book. I grew up Protestant and never knew any priests when I read the book and watched the movie. This story was really passionate and exciting. I watched the movie and thought that the actress who played Meggie, the woman from the Thornbirds, was really beautiful. I was hoping that when I grew up that I would look like her. I also thought that the actors who played the priest and the priest's son were really handsome. The only thing that bothered me about the book was that Meggie was mean to her daughter, who's father was her ex-husband. Other than that it was a great love story, especially when Meggie was a kid and Father Ralph, the priest in the book, was a substitute father to her.
Now that I am a grown-up and have been in a romantic relationship and have met a priest, I don't think that this story is a love story anymore. When you truly love someone, you place that person's desires and wants ahead of your own. Meggie acted very selfishly by seducing Father Ralph knowing how much his career meant to him and that he would lose it and his reputation, if people ever found out about it. (Of course this is fairy tale land and nobody figures it out). Losing everything that he worked for would hurt Father Ralph, but Meggie still slept with him to fulfill her own desires. Meggie may have loved Father Ralph, but her lust for him turned that love into selfishness.
Father Ralph is just as guilty. He knew that he didn't want to leave the priesthood for Meggie or anyone else, but he still slept with her. Meggie left her husband after she and Father Ralph had sex. Meggie never remarried, but continued coveting Father Ralph. If Father Ralph really cared about Meggie, he would put aside his own desires and encourage Meggie to move on, rather than encouraging her to keep waiting around for him. One thing that the book should have covered was the guilt Father Ralph must have felt telling priests and single people to remain chaste, while he is screwing around. Guilt never happens in fairy tale land.
Both of them were stupid and selfish for not thinking about the child that they may be creating and did make before they had sex. I suppose those thoughts always ruin one's mood for lovemaking in soap opera land. Then Meggie didn't think that it was wrong for her to lie to her son about who his dad is. Then this son had to grow up without his father or any man in his life because his parents desired people they couldn't have and thinking only of themselves gave into their lust. The Thornbirds is more of a self-love story than a romantic story.
I was reading some of the comments on the Thornbirds on Amazon.com and Youtube and all that I could think about was the priest who I know. He really loves being a priest, and he is a really wonderful person. The worst thing in the world would be for me to see him in pain, knowing that I caused it. If I did something that ruined his reputation and caused him to lose his career, which means so much to him, it would take a long time for me to forgive myself. It would really hurt him if he had a child who he couldn't see or help raise. This priest who I know cares about my faith in God so much that he would NEVER even suggest that we have a sexual relationship knowing that he would never leave the priesthood for me and that his actions would cause me to lose my faith again.
Personally, I feel that me and the priest I know is a better love story than Meggie and Father Ralph, even though we are not in love with each other. Now our relationship would not be exciting to watch on TV because we just sit around and talk about God and never touch each other, but we really care about one another, which is more than what I can say about Meggie and Father Ralph.
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